ढूंढते फ़िर रहे हैं, अब भी उस ख़ुदा को

घर का सामन खत्म हो गया था
भूलने की बीमारी तो पुरानी थी ही
सोचा एक फ़ेहरिस्त  बना लूँ....

पुराने कागज़ों के ढेर से
अनमने में  एक कागज़ उठाया
और आज की तारीख लिखी, लिखा -
१. बैंक का फिक्स्ड डिपाजिट तुड़वाना
२. बेसन
३. ज़ीरा
४. हरी  सब्ज़ियाँ / फल

लिखते हुए लगा की पन्ना जाना हुआ है
पीछे की लिखावट पहचानी हुई है
शायद उस बिसरे शायर की है
 जो उन पन्नो में कब का दफ़न हो चुका है

लफ्ज़ काफ़ूर  हो चले थे
मायने तो कब के मिट चुके थे
पर अब भी उसपे तुम्हारा नाम
उभर उभर के जता रहा है

बता रहा है, पन्नो में दफ़न शायर को
वो सब बेकार  था, बेमायने था, ग़ुबार था.
ढूंढते  फ़िर रहे हैं, अब भी उस ख़ुदा को
मिलेगा शायद ज़न्नत या दोज़ख में पड़ा हुआ ।

The middle finger

Reverence has its high place

And so does being polite

Being amiable might be a virtue

Till the time I catch you on a sly

I might not raise the finger middle

Think so in your imagination little

Old feelings will not stop it

They have been lying dead

I will raise it when I can

The ultimate gesture in my head.

Meltdown of an empire

Every time an empire crumbles there is shock and disbelief. History is strewn with cadaverous remains of civilizations and empires. Meltdown of an empire however commonplace is wonderful fodder for history, literature, cinema and all sorts of arts. Empire meltdown per se is never a good story. What's fascinating is our story in the context of these gargantuan meltdowns.

In our times, corporations have assumed the status of an empire, with the large ones worth more than the gross domestic product of so many sovereign states. The financial might that these corporations wield makes and breaks governments. It makes and abrogates laws and policies. It makes and breaks lives linked to it.At a more innocuous level it nurtures feelings, fondness and foolishness of permanence.

Like empires, corporations are born, they grow , they hit turbulent years and they perish or transform. Like the minions and the citizens of glorious empires the employees of corporations inadvertently allow  the identity of corporations and brand to become entrenched with their personas and identities.

Once upon a time... the horses grazing on the meadows and clinks of wine glasses ... war cries in new zones, victories ...turkish delights

And then... one day... 

the meltdown, the guerrillas, the internal intrigues, the external subterfuge, 

the ouster, the new guy on the realms, the laying off of the legions which had lost relevance.

the shock, the crumbling of our worlds, the feeling of betrayal which wasn't fair.

Good bye good friend... 

Dying and death

Part 1 - 

Dying and death, natural as they may seem, invariably invoke a response of shock and denial. Irony of life - life happens when it believes in its own perennial perpetuity and denies the existence of anti-life. Simply put, the feeling that death happens to others and may be to me as well is the truth you acknowledge readily but give it a shallow credence. 

Acknowledging death in all its certitude is something which does not come to us naturally because of two possible reasons.One the dichotomy and flip side existences are binary in nature, where as life and death are usually linear perpetual concepts and while you are one the other is deemed as mutually exclusive. If one applies some sort of religion and philosophy one can imagine life and death as cyclical as well as perpetuating in time.

Perpetuity or cyclical concepts are difficult to reconcile with as the references that give your life identity or the 'I-ness' are only applicable to the timelines of other people, places, milieu. Does it matter if you are back as something or someone else! The concern here then is foolish feeling of perpetuity of life and the identity you hold in the current context.

Satisfying oneself with perpetuity or cyclical nature of life where one would come back in some other form in some other time is difficult. Simple reason being the 'I-ness' in the context of current time is what is being mourned about.

Two sheer lack of training to understand and acknowledge death as a point in life. Whether that point is a full stop or a comma or an ellipsis that is a another matter to explore and mull over.

Part 2 - Euthanasia 

Part 3 - Geriatric hara kiri